Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
