dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
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