put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
