I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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