apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
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I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
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She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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