stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
farters have to be the big spoon...
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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