somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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