Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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