I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.