what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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