Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
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