And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize