margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
She told me I should be a condom model.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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