I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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