it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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