i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
