So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
