I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
