There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
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