community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
