Got a toothbrush?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
