Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
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