week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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