So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
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