Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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