Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I've blown a few things in my day
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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