I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
