haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
