He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
