I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
