is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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