just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
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