the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize