do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I yelled at your uterus for you.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
