I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
