it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
