Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I love you. Go after that dick
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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