ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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