Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
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