I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I just want nice things and good sex
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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