Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy