so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize
