I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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