I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize