Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
