Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
ugly people sure do ruin things
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
We left the knife in your bed.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
