Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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