the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Randomize
