the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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