I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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