lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize