Plan B is the new Plan A
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize